DO YOU PLAY THE BANJO?

Mr. Whatnot, that prestigious polyester, spent some time chatting with up and coming hip-hop artist Young Sim. I don't think a whole lot got accomplished....

THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE!

My buddy, Young Sim has just released a FREE mixtape that we have been talking about (see the interview below) called "Honest Flows is all I know" and I got to participate on the record a little. I just kinda... well.... silly all over the place. Click HERE and register on the site and download it for FREE! Everybody loves FREE!

IT'S NOT BARBARA WALTERS....

Here my friends, is an interview that I did this week with my good friend and business partner Young Sim. I asked the questions and he did the best he could to answer. We did a full, classy, interview, and we also did a "Chase" kind of interview with silly questions that will air at a later time (if I can get him to approve it, ahem...) He has put together a mixtape that you can download for FREE coming this monday to a computer near you. He has several guests contributing to his Hip-Hop,  (maybe even me throwing in my impression of Alicia Keys) and it is bound to be a success. Watch the interview below, and watch for a close connection between Sim and my secret crush, Tina Fey.....

And There you Have it!

WORKING HARD FOR THE MONEY

Hey, It's Mr. Whatnot taking over, again. I am here to give you a little photo and to tell you that I have been playing around with one of the best people in the music business.....
More to come!!

RETURN TO SENDER

As everyone knows, I like to watch "The View" (Does anyone remember me getting Don to watch the show late last year? He LOVED those ladies!) Click here to watch that!

Well, last week Whoopi and the girls were discussing an important adoption topic, that I thought was too important not to post on the blog!



You remember, those cats were thugs!

IT IS NOT A JOLLY HOLIDAY

Mr. Whatnot here. I have taken over the blog from the big dope for a minute. I am the little blue guy that you see from time to time. I took Sam the Dog to the park the other day and she was less than fun. I had my little camera with me, and thought I would get her to do a trick or something, but she didn't. She just ran me over! I got a grass stain on my polyester! uhhh! Here is a video of the ordeal....




ps. what a dump that park was!


~ Mr. Whatnot

HOW OLD IS TOO OLD?

I rarely watch 60 minutes. I rarely watch CBS! I feel that you after be "a certain age" to tune into that channel. I came across this video today of 60 minute commentator Andy Rooney as he was talking about "just how average american" he is, but "has no clue" who anyone is who is making music today. I think it is time for Mr. Rooney to retire. I wonder if he thinks that MICKEY Rooney and Judy Garland are still making movies and he can attend a double feature down town on saturday....



Watch CBS News Videos Online
video courtesy of cbsnews.com

oh, and just for the record, I have Ella Fitzgerald and Lady GaGa on my ipod right next to Jay-Z and Helen Reddy. Yes, Mr. Rooney, I do know who they all are. I will listen to them while you go and find a comb for that fabulous toupe you are trying to pull off...

THIS KID IS NOT A SINGLE LADY

I would have done this same thing!!

TO ALL THE MAMAS

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!

Happy Mother's day to three special women in my life that I consider my mothers. No, I do not come from a polygamist family. haha. Today I would like to send a  special message to these three and talk about each of them. My love runs deep for then each and we each have our own special mother/son/ friend relationship.  For that I am Eternally grateful to The Man in Charge. He must have know I was a "delicate" soul, and needed not one, not two, but three mothers to survive.

My maternal mother, Donna, raised me until I was 17 but then passed away when I was in high school due to complication to Diabetes. She is where I get my wit, my laugh, my passion, and my temper. At 5'1, girl was not afraid to give "the look" nor get on a step stool to look down and yell at ya! I even think she used a baseball bat as a mediator. It, uh,  worked...... haha. (I was never hurt, now!)

She taught me everything I needed to know when I was little. Like how to wash your hands. How to fold your socks. We dealt with the Santa crisis that comes with age. She taught me to say "Please" and "Thank you." She told me to choose my friends with wisdom. She taught me that "Jesus Wants me for a Sunbeam" and that my body is a Temple. The importance of a relationship with of Heavenly Father, and wanting to serve him. She lead the music in our church so I was the little kid that always got into trouble while my mom was up in front of everyone. The faster I did something, the faster she would lead the music! One time we did a 10 min hymn in 2 min flat! She also taught me how good a diet coke is after a long day.  Along with my Dad, They introduced me to some of the greatest comedians of all time, Johnny Carson, Jonathan Winters, Don Rickles, and Bob Hope, Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball, and we watched, All in the Family, I love Lucy, and The Dick Van Dyke Show to name a few.  I introduced them to the Muppets! By the way, no, I did not grow up in a nursing home. 17 years with her were precious, but not near enough. I miss her. I miss her a lot.                                          

When Mom passed my best friend's mom, Debbie, just stepped up, and from what I remember, told me that I should pack a bag a just live with them for awhile. (I know, it's all very Sandra Bullock in "The Blind Side") I stayed there and learned a few things that were very important: a strong work ethic. I spent some good ol' family fun down on the farm doin' fence and watering trees. Then fence is still there but the trees died. I guess I am not a Botanist after all.
They also reminded me the importance of my relationship with God. Something that had been established with my own mother, it was just placed into perspective with Debbie. She helped me get ready to serve an LDS Mission to Lubbock, Texas in 2003-2005 and has helped me recently as I am kicking and screaming into adulthood. In this, she has taught me strength. She has mothered me through good times and bad, and been a great fountain of advice as I take a path not many have taken. I know no matter what, I will have a mother's love from her. I also have introduced the Muppets to ALL the Buehlers.....


I was released from my LDS mission in October 2005 and my Aunt Kim (my stepmother's sister) had just lost her husband and both of her sons were married and she was looking ahead to an empty house and being all alone. I had no idea what I was really going to do with my life, so she MADE me come live with her. She had some strong feelings that she was to take care of me. The night before I was to move over to her house I contracted cellulites in my left leg and was in the hospital. I was in bed for months! She took care of me and just adopted me right from the get-go. We have been to Disneyland more times than I can count, and she is one of my biggest fans and always pushes and prods me along to do my best at what I want to do. She is always there to pick up the pieces if I fall, as well. She always wants me to work hard, and do what makes me happy. She is an eternal optimist! If I ever do a show, she is in the front row. Well, the second or third. She gets afraid I will throw something at her or call her on stage. She is also helping Debbie  as I am kicking and screaming through adulthood.  oh, I also introduced Kim to the Muppets.

I have heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason. They Bring something we must learn We are led to those who help us most to grow. If we let them, and if we help them in return. I hope I am keeping my end of the deal. Happy Mother's day to you two and to Mom, wherever you are, I hope you are celebrating and are happy. scratch that, I know you are happy. I love you. All three of you. And once again. I do not come from a polygamist family!!

LIVE FROM NY, IT'S BETTY WHITE!

So last night, I switched shifts, and actually had the night off and had the night off! I had to change a tire on my car. That was a blast. My mechanic is my four year old nephew, Boobie. (that's a nickname) He was all ready to do anything! Too bad neither one of knew what he heck we were doing!
Well, we got the tire changed (with help of the neighborhood) and then it was time for SNL hosted by the baddest girl in Hollywood, Betty White!

She killed it! As I watched her opening, it was like watching an old pro. She has worked with the greats (Johnny Carson, Bob Hope, ect.) and it has rubbed off. Her delivery was super, and she was great. Come september, I bet we see her walk away with an Emmy. But I am going to stop talking and post a few videos...

Here is her opening...



And here is one of her best sketches, in my humble opinion...



Oh, heck, just watch the whole episode! It is one of the best!!



My only regret is, I wish they would have pulled out a "Rose Nyland" sketch from Golden Girls, or even Sue Ann Nivens from Mary Tyler Moore. Over all it was one of their best!

THE BIGGEST TV EVENT OF THE YEAR

or at the very least, the funniest!

FAME

My Grandma used to tour with one of the biggest Rock and Roller's of all time! Here is my interview with her...

I DIDN'T KNOW...

I didn't know my florist was British! This sounds like a threat!

CHASE'S COMMENTARY CORNER

Okay, folks, I am just thinking and collecting my thoughts this morning and thought I would share with you. Plus I like the rhyming in the title of the post. Everything sounds better with "corner" put in it. No. Wait a second, now I sound like Tiger Woods.....

Kangaroo pouches amaze me. AMAZE me. It is like a "womb with a view"! How would you like it if your mother strapped your room to her stomach and hopped around with it. I think I would have always picked up my dirty socks. So do Kangaroos always have a C-section when they give birth? Do the kanga-babies birth out of the pouch? Do I want to know?

I was at Walmart earlier tonight and was browsing in the movie department. I saw that the movie "Cocoon" was recently released on blu-ray. We all remember that one, don't we? It is a movie from the late 80's about old people that are visited by aliens and a swimming pool is involved or something. I don't quite remember. When I saw that this had been released on hi-def blu-ray, I thought, "That movie is going to show more wrinkles and folds and creases than oragami. Poor Wilford Brimley." If you don't know who he is, google him. That movie is just littered with geriatrics....

It has been reported that Dame Elizabeth Taylor is ENGAGED! ENGAGED! (She has supposedly denied reports on her twitter. Twitter?! What a hip ol' granny! She is in her 70's, and tweets!) That woman has been married 8 times! Twice to the same man! She has famously told Oprah, Barbra Walters, Entertainment Tonight, and anyone who will listen, that she will NEVER marry again. (A little bit ago, I posted some videos of her anti-marriage rants, and even a howl! Just go back a few pages!) The Dame keeps things interesting! Well, you know what they say: "If at first you don't succeed, fail, fail, again....." or "The ninth time is the charm!"

and, in a final thought this morning---

My sister, Allison, is a happy, Mother and Wife that loves her family and loves life. We are bonded very much by our senses of humor and our fingers on the pulse of pop culture. Her favorite band is Five for Fighting that is known for such songs as, "Superman," "100 Years," "Disneyland," and their latest, "Chances." She took her loving husband, my brother-in-law, Justin, to a concert last week where she got to up her "groupie" status a little more. She went backstage after the show, to the meet and greet, and got to meet the singer/songwriter that rocks her socks. This would be equal for me meeting those Jonas Brothers, my favorite. So she tells the singer how much she loves the music, and the one thing that every rockstar wants to hear. "I crank up your music and listen to it while I clean my house!!!" He responded with a half-hearted "Great." and took a picture with her! So when the next Five for Fighting album comes out, I am sure that there will be talk by the band, "what songs will help Allison dust her shelves a little quicker?" "I think this song will really help her put some bounce in her house." They may even write a song or two just for her. I can hear them now..... "Dirty Laundry" or "Vaccum The Stairs"---

CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OF

I am involved and influenced by a many great people. My friend and business associate, Young Sim, is prepping a mix tape that he has been workin' hard on with original jams and remixes, and even talked me into (ok, I jumped at the chance faster than that new Miley Cyrus movie bombed at the box office [and no I have not seen it. yet.]) hosting the mixtape. I play a...well it's funny, and it's got some hip-hop that is clean, and makes you feel good. Here is a sample of  a remix of "State of Mind" that he did with Facts, in fact...



Now mind you, this mixtape will be available for free download SOON, and if this has not sold you enough, it will contain my stirring rendition of the Alicia Keys chorus of "Empire State of Mind" (I bet you can't wait.......)

MY, MY, WHAT A BIG CARROT YOU HAVE THERE.....

Happy belated Easter, there folks! I am just now finding the eggs, and let me tell you, it smells like rotten eggs around here! Either that, or I need to do my laundry.

 Do you know what is worse than finding an easter egg a week after Easter? Finding it two weeks late. Ha. Anyone? Is this thing on?

As a springtime gift, the folks over at The Muppet's Studio have gave us a viral video with a monster named Big Mean Carl, dressed as a bunny, and all he is asking is to "Stand By Me"......




There is nothing like a little violence served up by our friends, The Muppets.....

I AM NOT DEAD

Hey campers! I have been offline for a week or so. My mac decided to up and just blow-up on me the other day, so I have been without access to my little horse and pony show on the world wide internet of web here. Let me tell you, it has been rough. People have thought I have been depressed, or dead, or worse, actually busy with a life. Nope, just a computer malfuntion.

MARCH MADNESS, MADNESS, I TELL YOU!!!

 My friends over at The Muppetcast, (the Muppet podcast) and Toughpigs.com ( the Muppet fan site) have banned together to create a great amusement for us folks who don't get too excited over college basketball, but get excited over brackets, and elimination, and rub-it-in-your-face-if-you-lose-you-poor-sucker-competition.
They have come up with "The Muppet Madness Tournament" to take place in the month of March. It is The Show (The Muppet Show, that is) Vs. The Street (of Sesame) Vs. The Rock (of Fraggles) Vs. The Rest (Dark Crystal, Labyrinth, Muppet Babies, Anyone?) that make out our brackets. It is a hoot. A hoot, I said. I have peppered my post here with some fan-made art to demonstrate said hoot.

Week one, just finished, but you can still jump in. Go to: www.muppetcast.com/tournament to vote (you can vote every 12 hours!) and print yourself off one of those handy little brackets and start an office pool. Hey, before you know it, who will need the NCAA?

Have I still not sold you on this terrific, genius, sensational, Muppetational, idea yet? Well, listen to my buddy Steve Swanson talk about it by clicking here:  http://bit.ly/aJPSrs

Cute, huh? Yeah, he could sell exploding socks to a Gonzo anytime. Wait. That would not be hard. Anywho, Join in on the fun, or lose out, it's your loss, bub.
(We are all kind of holding our breath until the end to see if KERMIT vs. PIGGY will come to fruition for the championship. I pee myself just thinking about it.....)

And, I will even catch you up to speed. Here it is, hot off the press, week one, round one, level one, chapter one, page one, line one, the first.....well, the votes are in.....

Now go vote for this week! Kermit needs you!

NUN BOWLING!!

Holy smoke! Have you ever hit a spare sinning?



Wipe Out, Indeed!!!

IF YOU CAN ESCAPE FROM THE NAZIS YOU CAN HANDLE ANYTHING....

This June TVLAND will debut "Hot In Cleveland" starring future SNL host, (May 8) Betty White. She plays a Elka, a caretaker to a home that three women move into. This thing looks hilarious. 88 year old Betty White is the Hollywood "it" girl of the moment. She has only been around since the dawn of television to get here! Check out this short clip from TVLAND's "Hot In Cleveland" coming this June.....

"Are you a cop? Then what's it to ya?" HaHa I can't wait!